“I need somebody to love,” sang the Beatles, and they got it right. Love and health are intertwined in surprising ways. Humans are wired for connection, and when we cultivate good relationships, the rewards are immense. But we’re not necessarily talking about spine-tingling romance.
Physical well being is inseparable from emotional well being. Happy people are healthy people. The wisdom traditions of the world tell us that happiness does not depend on what you have, but on who you are. Let’s take a moment to reflect on what really creates happiness in us.
The following ten keys, gleaned from the wisdom traditions, may give us some insight.
- Listen to your body’s wisdom, which expresses itself through signals of comfort and discomfort. When choosing a certain behavior, ask your body, ‘How do you feel about this?’ If your body sends a signal of physical or emotional distress, watch out. If your body sends a signal of comfort and eagerness, proceed.
- Live in the present, for it is the only moment you have. Keep your attention on what is here and now; look for the fullness in every moment. Accept what comes to you totally and completely so that you can appreciate it, learn from it, and then let it go. The present is as it should be. It reflects infinite laws of Nature that have brought you this exact thought, this exact physical response. This moment is as it is because the universe is as it is. Don’t struggle against the infinite scheme of things; instead, be at one with it.
- Take time to be silent, to meditate, to quiet the internal dialogue. In moments of silence, realize that you are recontacting your source of pure awareness. Pay attention to your inner life so that you can be guided by intuition rather than externally imposed interpretations of what is or isn’t good for you.
- Relinquish your need for external approval. You alone are the judge of your worth, and your goal is to discover infinite worth in yourself, no matter what anyone else thinks. There is great freedom in this realization.
- When you find yourself reacting with anger or opposition to any person or circumstance, realize that you are only struggling with yourself. Putting up resistance is the response of defenses created by old hurts. When you relinquish this anger, you will be healing yourself and cooperating with the flow of the universe.
- Know that the world ‘out there’ reflects your reality ‘in here.’ The people you react to most strongly, whether with love or hate, are projections of your inner world. What you most hate is what you most deny in yourself. What you most love is what you most wish for in yourself. Use the mirror of relationships to guide your evolution. The goal is total self-knowledge. When you achieve that, what you most want will automatically be there, and what you most dislike will disappear.
- Shed the burden of judgment you will feel much lighter. Judgment imposes right and wrong on situations that just are. Everything can be understood and forgiven, but when you judge, you cut off understanding and shut down the process of learning to love. In judging others, you reflect your lack of self-acceptance. Remember that every person you forgive adds to your self love.
- Don’t contaminate your body with toxins, either through food, drink, or toxic emotions. Your body is more than a life-support system. It is the vehicle that will carry you on the journey of your evolution. The health of every cell directly contributes to your state of well being, because every cell is a point of awareness within the field of awareness that is you.
- Replace fear-motivated behavior with love-motivated behavior. Fear is the product of memory, which dwells in the past. Remembering what hurt us before, we direct our energies toward making certain that an old hurt will not repeat itself. But trying to impose the past on the present will never wipe out the threat of being hurt. That happens only when you find the security of your own being, which is love. Motivated by the truth inside you, you can face any threat because your inner strength is invulnerable to fear.
- Understand that the physical world is just a mirror of a deeper intelligence. Intelligence is the invisible organizer of all matter and energy, and since a portion of this intelligence resides in you, you share in the organizing power of the cosmos. Because you are inseparably linked to everything, you cannot afford to foul the planet’s air and water. But at a deeper level, you cannot afford to live with a toxic mind, because every thought makes an impression on the whole field of intelligence. Living in balance and purity is the highest good for you and the Earth.
Human beings have an enormous capacity to endure hardships and heartbreak. If their spirits are not broken, people can emerge from what seem like impossible circumstances to not only overcome the difficulties, but be enriched by them. It is when our spirits are broken that we are defeated and embittered by misfortune.
Co-Dependent people emerge from the chaos of childhood with different degrees of brokenness. Some do not make it. Many remain emotionally numb, but others plant their feet in the ground of recovery and grow.
I have the courage within me to go through the process of recovery.
From the book, “Gentle Reminders – Daily Affirmations for Codependents” by Mitzi Chandler.
< Left; Coming out of suffering is progressive – one step at a time. It seems impossible at the centre of suffering.
More happy justification for chocolate lovers: blood pressure responds favorably to cocoa, but not tea, a new analysis suggests.
Authors of the study say that while both products are rich in polyphenols, the study findings suggest that phenols in cocoa may be more active than those in tea. The study appears in the April 9 issue of the Archives of Internal Medicine.
“Products rich in cocoa may be considered part of a blood pressure lowering diet, provided that the total energy intake does not increase,” lead investigator for the study, Dirk Taubert, MD, PhD, from the University Hospital of Cologne in Cologne, Germany, told heartwire. “I believe that cocoa is healthier than other sugar confectionary or high-fat dairy products.”
Cocoa Beats Tea for blood pressure
In the cocoa studies, cocoa consumption was typically flavonol-rich chocolate in the range of 100 g per day; in the tea studies, consumption was in the range of 4 to 6 cups daily.
In the cocoa studies, blood pressure dropped; however, in the tea studies, no differences were seen in blood pressure. The authors point out that while the 2 substances contain similar amounts of polyphenols, the components of these polyphenols differ between cocoa and tea: cocoa is particularly rich in procyanidins, whereas black and green tea are rich in flavan-3-ols and gallic acid. It may be that the polyphenol components in cocoa are more bioavailable, Taubert and colleagues propose.
According to Taubert and colleagues, the effects of cocoa on blood pressure were comparable to those achieved with antihypertensive drugs. “The magnitude of the hypotensive effects of cocoa is clinically noteworthy; it is in the range that is usually achieved with single doses of medication,” they write.
“At the population level, this level of reduction of blood pressure would be expected to substantially reduce the risk of;
- stroke (by about 20%),
- coronary heart disease (by 10%), and
- all-cause mortality (by 8%).”
Research article published in the Arch Intern Med. 2007;167:626-634.
- 12 Promises for Recovery Beginners
- A BRIEF HISTORY OF THE TWELVE STEPS
- A problem shared is a problem halved
- Abstinence is only One Part of Recovery
- Addiction in the Family
- Adult children of alcoholics can practice being normal
- Alcohol Characteristics and Effects
- Alcohol in food may get you drunk
- Alcohol is toxic and damages the brain
- Alcohol quotes
- Alcoholic Family Roles
- Alcoholism at Home
- Am I an Alcoholic? – questionnaire.
- AM I CONTROLLING?
- Benzodiazepines Stories
- Best Practice Helping Plan
- Cannabis Potency
- Causes & consequences of alcohol-related brain shrinkage
- Clues to People with Problems
- Cough Medicine Abuse
- Craving reduction drug for alcohol and smoking
- Dark Chocolate OK by Doctors
- DENIAL AND RECOVERY
- DT’s – the Delirium Tremens
- Effects of gambling addiction
- Ego Quotes with Narcissistic Tendencies
- Emotional Bankruptcy or Alexthymia
- Facial features of fetal alcohol syndrome
- Functional and Dysfunctional Couples
- Harm to Partners, Wives, Husbands of Alcoholics
- Helping an alcoholic is possible in right circumstances
- How alcohol affects the drinker
- How to Recognize Alcoholism
- If Someone Has A Drink or Drug Problem
- Just for today card
- KidsPeace reaches out to troubled teens
- Maturity of Mind Through a Spiritual Awakening
- Mind guide to relaxation
- Narcissism and alcoholism recovery
- Overeaters Anonymous
- Parents Experiences of Teen Substance Abuse
- Partner Enabling of Alcoholism
- Physical Effects of Alcohol on Women
- Professional Alcoholism Training
- Recognizing Co-Dependency
- Releasing angry resentment
- Self-Help Links
- Smoking and Erectile Dysfunction
- Styles of Enabling Behavior
- The Adult Children of Alcoholics Laundry List
- The Dynamics of an Alcoholic’s Family
- The loneliness of an alcoholic doctor
- Twelve Step Development
- Twelve Steps of Sponsorship
- Twelve Steps to Insanity
- Types of Dysfunctional Families
- What is ACOA Co-dependency?
- What is alcoholism?
- What is Sexual Addiction?
- WHAT IS SPIRITUALITY?
- Young adults in denial about alcohol abuse
“If I do not want what you want,
Please try not to tell me that my want is wrong.
Or if I believe other than you,
at least pause before you correct my view.
Or if my emotion is less than yours,
or more, given the same circumstances,
try not to ask me to feel more strongly or weakly.
Or yet if I act, or fail to act,
in the manner of your design for action, let me be.
I do not, for the moment at least,
ask you to understand me.
That will come only when you are willing
to give up changing me into a copy of you.
I may be your spouse, your parent, your offspring,
your friend, or your colleague.
If you allow me any of my own wants,
or beliefs, or actions, then you open your-self
so that someday these wants of mine
might not seem so wrong,
and might finally appear to you as right – for me.
To put up with me is the first step in understanding me.
Not that you are no longer irritated or disappointed
with me for my seeming waywardness.
And in understanding me you might come to prize
my differences from you, and far from seeking to change me,
preserve and even nurture those differences.”
|Long Walk to Freedom: The Autobiography of Nelson Mandela
by Nelson Mandela
Online 12-Step Radio
Since its launch on April 17, 2004, 12-StepRadio.com has been playing "recovery music" 24/7.
The Internet station’s mission is to carry the twelve step message with music to people in all types of recovery.
The music played on 12StepRadio.com is a diverse cross-section of highly talented, independent artists with some songs from major-label CDs being played as well.
Beginning with a play list of less than 50 songs, the station now has 200 songs in rotation.