Recovery Is Sexy.com is For Sale



for_sale_signRecoveryIsSexy.com has led a revolution in how recovery is viewed/ considered – without ignoring spiritual principles. From humble beginings the altruistic factual principles of the site have become part of the recovery experience for many – and growing.

Based on the 12 Step fellowships it includes over 1,500 articles on ‘relationships in recovery’, alcoholism, co-dependency, gambling, drug addiction, ACOA’s, sexuality, sex addiction and more.

The sale includes 2 extra sites – Alcohol Coach.com and Alcoholism Coach.com.

With over 6,000 Twitter followers and 5,000 Facebook friends and many other sites linking in the Recovery Is Sexy.com network is extensive.

My Last Cup

Australia New Zealand L58

No longer a slave to the poker machines

For finally, I have broken their wicked spell

And each time temptation tries to lure me back

I just remember ‘my living hell.’

The tangled web of lies, ‘constant’ and ugly deceit

Sleepless nights of ‘frantic worry’

‘No food left to eat.’

The fear of opening up my mail box to find another

‘I can’t pay it bill’

Eventually they stole it all

No longer giving me ‘that thrill.’

The tormented thoughts of ‘self hatred’

Of the longing to ‘simply die’

Empty, guilt filled nights

‘No tears left to cry.’

‘Yes’, in the beginning the pokies helped me feel

‘Exhilarated, happy, content and alive’

The ‘sounds of lights, the free spins’

‘So much pleasure’ I derived.

The atmosphere ‘most welcoming’

Giving me a sense of security, comfort

I felt a ‘warmth all around’

And as the coffee, cakes and biscuits flowed

I felt ‘so safe and sound.’

The endless ‘jackpots’ and ‘giveaways’

I actually believed I had the ‘Midas touch’

But in the end I lost all sense of reality

And ‘my self, pretty much.’

And all of my old friendships

I had pushed aside ‘long ago’

I think to myself…‘if only’ I knew back then

‘What today I now know.’

I remember clearly that day

When I finally reached into ‘my last cup’

‘I looked down and saw it bare’

And I realised in that moment

‘What I needed, I would never find it there.’

Jen

Enhanced by Zemanta

Poll; Is recovery from alcoholism / addiction sexy?

What is your experience with people in recovery from alcoholism, addiction, codependency, and ACOA.

Were they sexy when practicing their dysfunctional behaviour?

Have they become more attractive since being in recovery?

Cast your vote in this poll.

Is recovery from alcoholism / addiction sexy?

===============================

Raising a Peer Pressure-Proof Child

Teenagers in record store Teen Peer Pressure: Raising a Peer Pressure-Proof Child

Learn what kinds of peer pressure teens face, who’s most vulnerable, and how to help your son or daughter resist.

Remember when your teenager took her first steps as a toddler? You hovered behind her — back bent, arms spread — prepared to catch her should she fall. Much as you might like, you can’t shadow your adolescent as you did back then, being there to break her fall when she missteps.

But, say experts, there are steps you can take to support your adolescent in the face of teen peer pressure. Follow them and you’ll rest easier when your teen heads out of the house on a Friday night.

Teen Peer Pressure: What’s Being Pushed?

Here are some findings from recent surveys.

  • Smoking. By the time adolescents are just 13, one in five has tried smoking.
  • Alcohol use. Two-thirds of teens between the ages of 14 and 17 have tried alcohol. Of teen boys who have tried alcohol, 20% did so by the time they were 12. Episodic, or binge drinking, is also fairly common. Of the adolescents aged 12 to 17, one in four said they’d had five or more drinks consecutively within the past month. Almost a quarter of drinkers aged 16 to 21 admitted to driving after drinking.
  • Drug use. Slightly more than 25% of adolescents aged 14 to 17 have used illegal drugs. One-third of young adult marijuana users aged 18 to 21 started using the drug by the time they turned 14.
  • Sex. About one in every three kids aged 14 to 15 has had sexual intercourse. Of sexually active teens, almost 30% used no birth control during their last sexual encounter.

Other subjects in this article include;

  • Identifying Vulnerable Teens
  • Why Teens Fall Prey to Peer Pressure
  • Making Your Child Resilient to Teen Peer Pressure

In spite of adolescents’ vulnerability and the strong influence of peers, parents can exert a positive influence on their adolescents’ decision-making processes, offering them ways to combat the effects of peer pressure. Experts explain how. Strategies include;

  • Keep communication lines open
  • Practice peer pressure scenarios
  • Listen to your teen’s perspective
  • Keep inviting your kids into your life
  • Think beyond punitive responses

This article has some excellent proven strategies and can be found at; Raising Peer Pressure Proof Teens.

The Complete Idiot’s Guide to Surviving Peer Pressure for Teens by Sara Jane Sluke, Hilary Cherniss, Sara Jane Sluke Hilary Cherniss
Friends, Cliques, and Peer Pressure: Be True to Yourself (Teen Issues) by Christine Wickert Koubek

See also;

Popular Posts

small-waterfall-into-stream-an-1.jpg

  • Alcoholic Family Roles
  • 12 Promises for Recovery Beginners
  • A BRIEF HISTORY OF THE TWELVE STEPS
  • A problem shared is a problem halved
  • Abstinence and harm reduction
  • Addiction in the Family
  • Addiction is a disease, not a lifestyle
  • Adult children of alcoholics can practice
  • Alcohol and Pregnancy
  • Alcohol and the Family
  • Alcohol Characteristics and Effects
  • Alcohol is toxic and damages the brain
  • Alcohol quotes
  • Am I an Alcoholic? – Questionnaire.
  • AM I CONTROLLING?
  • Anti-Alcohol Ads Promote Drinking?
  • Atheists, Agnostics and Alcoholics Anonymous
  • Benzodiazepines Stories
  • Best Practice Helping Plan
  • Blackouts – What Happened?
  • Brain damaged by alcohol
  • Cannabis and mental health
  • Causes & consequences of alcohol-related brain shrinkage
  • Child sexual abuse in Aboriginal communities
  • Controlled drinking?
  • Coping With Stress
  • Cough Medicine Abuse
  • Craving reduction drug for alcohol AND smoking
  • Dark Chocolate OK by Doctors
  • Detachment with love
  • Dr Bob’s story of the AA Camel
  • Drinking Causes Gout Flare-ups
  • DT’s – the Delirium Tremens
  • Effects of gambling addiction
  • Ego Quotes with Narcissistic Tendencies
  • Emotional Bankruptcy or Alexthymia
  • Facial features of fetal alcohol syndrome
  • FDA Steps Up Warnings on Chantix
  • Forgiveness and Anger
  • Functional and Dysfunctional Couples
  • God Help Me, Spiritual Pleasures can Replace Drug Addiction
  • Harm to Partners, Wives, Husbands of Alcoholics
  • Harmful Effects of Alcohol on Sexual Behaviour
  • Helping an alcoholic is possible in right circumstances
  • How alcohol affects the drinker
  • How Alcoholics Anonymous is changing
  • Is Alcoholism A Disease?
  • Just for today card
  • Little eyes, little ears
  • Methadone and alcohol abuse don’t mix
  • Narcissism and alcoholism recovery
  • Overeaters Anonymous
  • Partner Enabling of Alcoholism
  • Patterns of Co-dependence and ACOA’s
  • Physical Effects of Alcohol on Women
  • Professional Alcoholism Training
  • Recognizing Co-Dependency
  • Recovery MP3 tracks for all 12-Step Fellowships
  • Releasing angry resentment
  • Self-Help Links
  • Sleep problems affect alcoholism recover
  • Smoking and Erectile Dysfunction
  • Styles of Enabling Behavior
  • The AA Recovery Paradoxes
  • The Adult Children of Alcoholics Laundry List
  • The Dynamics of an Alcoholic’s Family
  • THE WOUNDED SPIRIT
  • Twelve Step Development
  • Twelve Steps of Sponsorship
  • Types of Dysfunctional Families
  • Verification of C. G. Jung’s Analysis of Roland Hazard and the History of Alcoholics Anonymous
  • Wellbriety Recovery for Native Americans
  • What is ACOA Co-dependency?
  • What is Alcohol Harm Reduction?
  • What is alcoholism?
  • Leaving an Abusive Relationship

    For abused women, leaving is a complex and confusing process

    Adult couple arguing and walking on street uid 1453650 I have seen and heard of this process in many of my clients (men and women) who were partners of alcoholics, addicts, compulsive gamblers or sex addicts.

    Additionally, I have seen these stages of leaving in recovering people who have codependent partners who will not change their behaviours. In other words, the codependent behaviour is itself abusive.

    —————————————————

    Nothing could be easier than walking out the door, right? According to a new University of Illinois journal article, an abused woman actually goes through a five-step process of leaving that can be complicated at every stage by boundary ambiguity.

    "When a woman is disengaging from a relationship, she is often unclear about her family’s boundaries. Is her partner in or out of her life? A woman’s spouse may be physically in the home but psychologically unavailable. He’s not caring for the kids or being a loving partner.

    "Or she may have physically left him but still be psychologically connected. She misses him, and for the sake of her children, she’d like for her family to be together again," said Jennifer Hardesty.

    "We could see this struggle clearly in the pictures women drew of their families at different points in the process of leaving. It’s a confusing time. The boundaries are ambiguous,"" she said.Group of teenagers watching movie in a dark theater uid 1176402

    "It’s not unlike the experience of having a child leave for college," she noted. "Your child isn’t living at home, but you’re still very connected to them emotionally. Yet, when they come home for visits, they may pay little attention to you while they make the rounds of their friends. It’s always hard to figure out what the new boundaries are as you move into a new stage of life."

    Khaw has applied the model to 25 abused women from varied backgrounds, identifying boundary ambiguity within the five stages of the process of leaving.

    "In the first two stages, women begin to disconnect emotionally from their relationships. You hear them say things like, I started not to care for him anymore," Khaw said

    Stage 3 is often marked by a pileup of abusive episodes and noticeable effects of the violence on their children. "Women make preparations to leave, such as finding a place to stay or secretly saving up money. This stage is important for women as they switch from thinking about leaving to actually doing something about it," she said.

    "Then, at Stage 4, when women take action, we see a lot of what we call back and forthing because when women leave, the emotions often come back. They need clarity. They want to be physically and emotionally connected again," said Hardesty.

    The last stage, maintenance, is achieved when women have been gone for six months or more. "But even then they may have boundary ambiguity if their ex-spouse won’t let them go. With continued contact through court-ordered child visitation, the potential for ongoing abuse remains as well as continued confusion over the abuser’s role in the woman’s life," she said.

    In the past, Khaw and Hardesty have used the model to focus on what individual women are going through. But applying boundary ambiguity to the model gives a more complete picture of the process.

    "Leaving a relationship is much more complex than just deciding to change, and it involves more than a woman’s prioritizing her safety. Other actors are involved. The abuser makes decisions that affect a woman’s movement through the stages. And children can be a powerful influence in motivating a woman to get out of a relationship and in pulling her back in," Hardesty said.

    It’s important for social work professionals and frustrated family and friends to understand the process of leaving, Hardesty said.

    "Often shelter workers focus on safety and tangible needs such as a job and housing. They don’t help women disentangle themselves emotionally. But it’s hard for women to get out of the situation if they haven’t resolved these relationship issues.

    "Discouraged friends and family members have to learn to view leaving as a process and realize that there’s little they can say to speed it along. It’s important for them to reinforce the risks the woman is facing by asking such questions as ‘Has he become more abusive? Does he have a gun?’

    "When talking to an abused friend or family member, one should always emphasize safety, but for your own sanity, you should realize that leaving is a process and she has to work her way through it herself," she said.

    When women do finally achieve both physical and emotional separation, research shows that they experience fewer health problems and less depression, Hardesty said.

    From a press release by; Lyndal Bee Lian Khaw, a University of Illinois at Urbana-Champaign doctoral student, and Jennifer Hardesty are co-authors of the paper, which was published in the Journal of Family Theory & Review.

    Pajama Gamblers

    Digital image of woman s face on laptop screen uid 1278928 Pajama gamblers could lose their shirts: Online gambling can be dangerously comfortable

    People who gamble from the comfort of their home tend to think they’re more in control of their gambling than people who gamble in casinos, according to a new study in the Journal of Consumer Research.

    Authors June Cotte (University of Western Ontario) and Kathryn A. Latour (University of Nevada-Las Vegas) found surprisingly little previous research on their subject: the habits and motivations of online gamblers, who contribute to a $10 billion a year industry.

    Their study found that, unlike casino gamblers, who seek thrills and social experiences, online gamblers seek the anonymity their home computers provide. "For casino gamblers, gambling provides a perceived social connection with unknown others in a sense of shared fates and temporary community. Online gamblers, on the contrary, perceive a lack of social connections in the online realm."

    The researchers conducted a study of 30 Las Vegas gamblers. Ten were online gamblers and 20 were casino gamblers, and all considered themselves to be regular gamblers. The study involved in-depth interviews using visual images and collages created by the participants.

    In the course of the study, the authors found significant differences in perceptions and attitudes between people who gamble in casinos and people who gamble on their home computers. Because sensations are not as intense in online gambling, online gamblers tend to play for longer amounts of time, and they think they’re more in control of their gambling, the authors found.

    The authors believe that regulating online gambling may remove the excitement of doing something illicit.

    "When gambling consumption moves into the home, gambling behavior becomes a part of everyday living. When not seen as reserved solely as behavior for an outing, gambling is more likely to become an insidiously integrated component of a consumer’s life," the authors conclude.

    Research report; June Cotte and Kathryn A. Latour. "Blackjack in the Kitchen: Understanding Online Versus Casino Gambling" Journal of Consumer Research: February 2009.

    See also;

    England cricketers to get drink, drug and gambling counselling

    english cricket England’s best cricketers, including the likes of Andrew Flintoff, are to be offered counselling to combat potential drink, drug and gambling addiction.

    The England and Wales Cricket Board (ECB) has decided that its international stars should all enrol on a course to protect them from such temptations.

    It has been convinced by the Professional Cricketers’ Association (PCA) to put them on its Addictive Behaviour Programme.

    The programme will help the top cricketers to “self-manage your own problem(s) and be able to focus on the challenges of playing cricket at the highest level”.

    Although cricket has traditionally been above the sort of disreputable behaviour that has dogged other sports, concern has been raised in recent years at the antics of some members of the England team.

    Full story at English Cricketers and Drinking

    See also;

    11 Ways to Detect and Solve Internet Addiction

    typing on keyboard uid 1177655 People in recovery are always in danger of switching addictions from alcohol, drugs, gambling or codependency. This article may help if one follows the tips before a real addiction develops.

    I’m not a psychiatrist: if you fear your problem is so serious you need professional help, go out and see one.

    I’m going to write this article for those who might have trouble leaving the computer behind when the back of your eyes are telling you it’s definitely bedtime, but your spouse hasn’t packed up and left yet as a result of it – not quite a full-blown addiction, just on your way there.

    Detecting the Problem

    The problem with many addictions is that it can be hard to tell when a hobby has become more than just that, and taken a hold on you. It can also be hard to be honest with yourself when facing a list of symptoms, so make the extra effort now – we’re going to go through a few.

    1. You spend more time with the computer than with people.
    2. You can’t abide by your own boundaries.
    3. Lying to others about your computer usage.
    4. Feeling unable to live without the computer/internet.
    5. Misguided spending on your computer.

    Solving the Problem

    Solving the problem on your own, or with the support of your family, requires that you’re doing so before it gets out of hand and to the point where you need to pay excessive prices for therapy. If you’re unsure, trying to solve it on your own and seeing how far you get is a great test – if you can’t manage it, go get help.

    These tips should get you well on your way to a more balanced life.

    Full story and explanation of the tips at; 11 Ways to Detect and Solve Internet Addiction

    See also;